Is it summer break yet???

I'm exhausted. Taking care of Edison on my own at nights and getting him and myself ready and to our places on time is literally draining me. Yesterday I went to sleep around 6:00pm. I never heard Matt shower, get ready, OR leave for work. Edison woke me around 11, I gave him a bottle and he went back down until 5:30. I felt much better a rested today.

At 4:00, Edison had pictures made with Julie Hedges (wedding photographer). Originally, I decided we would not have "professional" pictures of Edison made since Matt got me such a nice camera, but in messages back and forth on facebook, she really wanted to take his picture. I knew I couldn't afford them so I kept backing away from the subject. In a recent message she sent, she said,"Dangit, bring that baby to me or I'm coming to get him!" So....I brought him...she, being the sweet heart she is, offered to GIVE me a cd of the pictures

When I dropped Edison off with my mom this morning, I stressed the importance of him getting a nap right before pictures so that he would be all smiles. I left work 15 minutes early and on the way to her house I called her. She told me that he had not had a nap in a long time. I just knew he was going to be tired/cranky. I met Mama and we rode together to Julie's. When we got there, Edison was just as happy as could be. He was such a good sport! I can't wait to see the pictures. Even though Julie is giving me a cd, no charge. I'm SURE I'll want to order more and book another sessions with her..and hey, maybe that was her intention in the first place ;) Either way, I'm glad we did it. I was thrilled with the newborn pictures Mama and I took of him when he was 4 days old. If you ask me, it was professional material. Now that he is 5 months, I'm glad we were able to get some more pictures that will be extra professional. Julie, if you read this...thank you. I'm sure I will be booking more sessions...haha

Tonight, Mama and I started a photography class. It's through CSU's continuing education program. The class is every Thursday, for a month, and then on Saturday, January 28th, we will have an ALL day long picture session that is hands on. We learned SO much about our cameras and about ISOs, aperture, and shutter. I think I'm going to take my camera to school tomorrow to play around. I'll take some of my students during "Friday Free Play".
By the way, I do not plan to become a professional or make money off of photography. I'm just taking classes so that I know everything about my camera and how to use it properly. :)

Tomorrow is Friday and Monday is a holiday! Thank you, Jesus!

I look back at this year and wonder if I could have done all of this on my own (teaching on my own). I am so grateful for my team teacher. She was there when I was on maternity leave and always steps up to the plate whenever there is a need. She isn't as straight-forward as me and I just hope she enjoys teaming with me as much as I enjoy teaming with her.

Edison is spending the night with Maw tonight...For some reason, I feel guilty. I feel as if I should be caring for him at all times. I understand that I have to go to work and therefore someone else has to watch him during those hours, but when I am able to care for him, I feel like I need to be caring for him. After our photography class, we came back to my parents' houses where Edison was (Uncle Go Go was watching him). I woke him up and was preparing to put him in his carrier. My mom told me I ought to let him stay with her. Previous times I have declined the offer. I think he was 3 or 4 weeks old the last time he stayed with her. I said yes. I have to realize that she WANTS him to spend the night and she WANTS me to be able to rest. I don't know what I'd do without my Mama....speaking of that, my best friend from Elementary school lost her mom. She had a heart attack in her sleep...how awful..and scary.. My heart breaks for her.

I also have a friend from high school who just had a baby about 2 months ago. He was born with a cleft lip/palate. He is so precious. He has many surgeries awaiting him in the future and my heart goes out to my friend and her husband. I. can. not. imagine. Nor do I want to imagine having to watch my child endure such awful things.

Matt's cousin is about 3 months old and the doctors discovered that he has cataracts on both of his eyes. He is basically blind. Again, my heart feels so heavy. I just can't imagine the worry and hurt that these mothers must feel.

I thank God for Edison and just pray that he will continue to be healthy...you just never know. Life is so crazy.

Well...I'm baby free tonight and it's after 11:00. I better take advantage of this sleep I'm about to get!

Night, all!

5 months!

Edison is five months old...wow, time is flying! So far, he has liked all of the vegetables that he has tried: carrots, squash, peas, and mixed veggies. He likes to play on his back on the floor, but gets mad when he rolls himself on his tummy. He only likes to be on his tummy if it's time to sleep. He started rolling from his tummy to back at three weeks old. At four months, he finally figured out how to roll from tummy to back. For the past week, he has been sleeping from 9:30 to 6:00. He is teething, but hasn't cut a tooth yet. I give him oatmeal in the mornings, and a vegetable at dinner time. He babbles the most when he is in the car. He has a toupee! Most of his hair fell out except right at the top! He normally drinks 6 oz every 3 to 4 hours. He is a very happy baby! He wears 6 months clothes and goes through a few bibs a day because of all the drooling. He gets a bath every other night and we use the night time stuff. Before bed,i put a little rice in his bottle to help him sleep longer.
He is waking up...

Back to work!

I went back to work today after a wonderful 2 weeks of Christmas break. It wasn't so bad, but my body will have to readjust. I've gotten used to waking up with Edison around five, giving him a bottle, and going back to bed for a few more hours. Now it will be give Edison a bottle a get ready and no going back to sleep. With Matt being on 3rd shift, it's a lot of work for one person. I feel for single moms. I'm glad to at least have Matt in the evenings. Tonight I really wanted to go to choir, but after being away from Edison all day, and rarely seeing Matt, I just wanted to be home with my boys. We didn't do anything special, but I was able to feed Edison carrots for the first time and give him a bath. I feel guilty every Wednesday that I'm not there, but then when I am,i feel guilty for leaving Edison a second time in one day. Once I get home, it's bed time for Edison and me, and Matt is leaving for work....Then I try to justify skipping choir. I was so loyal for so long. Do I go to practice, or do I spend time with my family? Tonight,i chose choice number two....

As I type, I have the cutest, sweetest smelling, cuddly little baby boy sitting beside me looking at the bright screen. Oh...I also have a sweet, furry, cuddly dog on my other side. Life is good.

Tomorrow the kids come back to school. Hopefully Edison will sleep well so that I have the energy for my other 35 kiddos!

Recap of Christmas 2011

Christmas was very special this year because Matt and I woke up to the greatest gift ever, our son. I know that gifts are not the meaning of Christmas, but nevertheless, gifts are given, and I gave and received some pretty cool things. I had a photo book made of Edison's birth for my parents, my Aunt Sharon, Matt's parents, and Matt's grandparents. As soon as I get over some debt, I plan to get another one printed for my Grandparents. I also had a personalized calendar made for my mom. Each month has a collage of pictures from that same month a year earlier. Matt's big gift was a banjo. I'm SO glad I got it for him because he is really enjoying it. He loves "The Office" so if you're a watcher of that show, you may remember the "rabies fun run show". I got him the fun run shirt that they wore on the office. I also got him some clothes, the book "Decision Points", and the 1st season of "The Walking Dead" on blu ray. My mom always goes above and beyond. She loves to give. She had Edison's coming home outfit put in a shadow box. She also got me a lot of other random things that I circled in some magazines. When we were kids, we would circle things that we wanted for Christmas from magazines such as Toys R Us. Many years later, she still has me circling things! haha...She got me some things for my camera, but most importantly, she got me PHOTOGRAPHY CLASSES!!! To make that gift even better...we will be taking the class together! We are going to have so much fun! Matt got me a new lens for my camera and some other things for my camera. He also got me a remote control for my camera. On Christmas morning, we were able to take a picture of us with the camera remote instead of using the timer function on the camera...too neat! I made a breakfast casserole. I really wanted to go to church. I love going to church on Christmas. We didn't make it. :/ The pictures below are pictures I took using the remote! :)

It was a wonderful Christmas. I look forward to teaching Edison the reason for Christmas! Matt's dad (Pappy) blessed us this Christmas with new tires for my car. I needed them in a bad way and we are so grateful for that gift! Most of all, my favorite part of Christmas was sitting in my living room with just my husband and baby with wrapping paper all over the floor. I love my little family!

Resolutions? Nahhh

I never keep resolutions...Instead, I am making goals for myself for the year 2012. Want to hear?? Goal #1: I'd like to be better about blogging so that when 2012 comes to a close, I can look back over the year and remember. I'd also like to print it and put it in some type of book/journal. When things happen I always think I'll remember it...then, it becomes a faint memory and I can't remember what month the certain situation or memory happened. Goal #2. Within 5 months, Edison has already grown over 6 inches and gained over 8 pounds. It seems as if I blinked and he was sitting up and grabbing things! I plan to take a picture of him every day in the year 2012. So far, I've done good! Granted we've only been in 2012 for 2 days, it's a start! :) Goal #3: I don't plan to lose an X amount of weight, but I plan to eat healthier and do some fun workouts. Matt got me a Kinect for the xbox for Christmas. He also got me "Just Dance 3". It's a fun way to sweat :) I plan to do a lot of dancing in the comfort of my own home and maybe help lose a few lbs. :) Goal #4: Cook more! Goal #5: Learn to use my wonderful camera better. Goal #6: Print all the pictures that have been taken since Edison's birth and put them in a photo book. Goal #7: Plan the night before...Now that Matt is back on 3rd shift (11 PM-7AM) I am responsible for taking care of Edison during the night and getting him to the baby sitter's/Maw's house before I leave for school. In the mornings, I'm running around like a crazy person trying to figure out what I'm going to wear, what Edison is going to wear, what to eat for lunch, what to pack for Edison, etc. etc! It's too stressful and many times I am literally running out of the door...my "GOAL" is to have everything ready the night before so that I can save myself the stress. Goal #8: Give more. I love hearing stories about people paying for others in fast food drive-thrus or at restaurants. I have done that twice and it was a great feeling. It was also kind of funny to watch the lady's face as the cashier was explaining that her ticket had been paid. I also love receiving just because cards or those cards that are "Just thinking of you"...I'd like to do more random acts of kindness in the year 2012. I really wanted to have 12 Goals for 2012... Kind of silly, but I thought it would make for a good title...I can really only think of 8 things I really want to achieve in 2012. ...whatever :) Matt's grandparents came down from Wyoming. We haven't seen them since our wedding. Granddaddy's health is slowly declining and we wanted to make sure we got to spend time with him. The original plan was for us to go see them in Wyoming, but the plane tickets were going to cost almost an arm and a leg and probably a finger or two from the remaining hand! They came down instead. Matt and I wanted them to stay with us, but Matt's mom insisted that they stay with her. They slept in a camper outside Matt's parents' house. They came and stayed with us for 2 nights and it was great to spend the quality time with them. I am loving life with Edison. When I say God answered my prayers, he truly did. When I was pregnant with Edison, I prayed for things that I'm sure many moms pray for. I prayed for his condition in my womb, a healthy delivery, and a healthy baby. I also prayed that he would be a baby who was full of joy and happiness. I prayed specific things. I prayed that he would have his Daddy's sense of humor and be cuddly and affectionate like me. I'm sure that all moms want the best for their children. I just pray that he comes to know and love the Lord. I pray that we (Matt and I) will be able to steer him in the right direction to becoming a man of God. The first 3 months of his life were a little rough. He has gas and tummy troubles. He cried almost every time he took a bottle. I just knew he was unhappy. Around 4 months, it was almost as if a switch was flipped. He is THE happiest baby. He is so sweet and cuddly. He makes us laugh already and he's only 5 months old. Tonight before I put him in bed, I rocked him in his room and prayed. A lot of it was tears of thankfulness for what God has given me. I do not take for granted the child that is mine. He is a gift from God and I couldn't have asked for anything better. I love everything about him. I love all of the noises he makes when he eats and sleeps. I love the smile he gives me when I come to get him in the mornings, the smiles he gives me when I get him out of the car, and the smiles he gives me when I pick him up after work. All I have to do is look at him, walk by him, or touch him and he gives me the sweetest smile. I can't imagine life without him and I'm looking forward to what's to come! I've had a wonderful Christmas break with Matt and Edison. I'm sad to see it go, but summer break will be here in 4.5 months or so. Sorry if my grammar isn't always "grammatically correct". A lot of my blogging will be on my phone, and hey, at least I'm blogging! :) If you're reading this, I pray you have a wonderful new year. It has so many possibilities! Stay positive and try to see the good in all situations. Live, laugh, and love. Don't take the small things too seriously. Don't focus too far in to the future. Take one day at a time and make the most out of it. Spend time with your loved ones and stay away from negativity. Take lots of pictures! Life is fleeting. (I'm also saying all of this to myself!)

Letter to Edison Dec. 30

December 30, 2011 My happy baby boy, You are 21 weeks today. You are growing so quickly. I wish I had a button to slow time down. As I type, you are sleeping on the guest bed beside me making the sweetest noises. You can now grab things. You put anything you can in your mouth. At your last doctor visit, you were 26.5 inches long and weighed 15 pounds. You are my joy. Your smile is so contagious. Right now you are experimenting with your voice. It is the cutest thing. When Daddy and Go Go play their instruments, you sound like you’re trying to sing. You started eating rice and oatmeal about a month ago. You have oatmeal in the mornings. You started eating vegetables a few days ago. Your great grandmother (Maw Maw) fed you squash for the first time. You were such a good sport and made the funniest faces. We recorded it and took pictures. Two nights ago you had peas for the first time. You like peas. You sleep on your tummy and you are great about taking naps and going to bed. We do not have to rock you to sleep like some moms do with their children. Sometimes I rock you because I want to and because I know that you won’t be this little for long. Everyone comments on how happy you are. You are such a good baby. Daddy and I are so blessed. Maw, Daddy, and I took you to see Santa. You didn’t cry. Of course, at this point, you will let anyone hold you and love on you. You had so much hair when you were born, but a lot of it has fallen out around the sides. You have a good bit of hair right on the top of your head. When you wake up, it looks crazy and Daddy and I always laugh at the crazy mess of hair on top of your head. You eat around 6 oz of formula every 3-4 hours. When you are hungry, you scream until we pop the bottle into your mouth. As long as you aren’t hungry, you are a very easy-going baby. You steal the hearts of everyone who comes in contact with you. You met your Maw Maw and Grandaddy for the first time last week and they are crazy about you. You even talked to them (in your baby language). As I look back, I can’t believe it’s been almost 5 months since you were born. It seems like last week. I can’t believe how much you have grown. I shake my head as I put clothes away that are too small for you to wear. You wear 6 months clothes. You wore newborn clothes for 2 weeks. You wore 0-3 months for about a month. You wore 3 month clothes for a month. 3-6 month close for about 2 weeks and have been in 6 months close for a little over a month now. I take pictures of you all the time. When I put them on the internet for people to see, I just about add them all because I think they are all adorable. Even though I am sometimes saddened by your rapid growth, I also look forward to the new things that come along with each milestone. You have this toy that hangs from the handle of your carrier. I remember when you looked at it. Then I remember when you smiled at it. I remember when you raised your arm as if trying to grab it, but you couldn’t quite get the coordination to touch it. I remember when you touched it, and then you were touching it over and over and made it swing back and forth. One day as I was driving, I heard you pull it down (because it makes a funny noise when it’s pulled and retreats back to the original position), I was so excited. Now, you pull it all the time as if it is the easiest thing in the world to do. Your pediatrician says that you are perfect. We really like him. His name is Dr. Oliver. He takes his time with us when we take you to see him. You got shots at the last visit. You cried as they gave 5 shots to you, but you quickly got over them and became happy again. You ran fever the next day, but we gave you baby Tylenol and you were fine. Daddy and I think you may be teething. You gnaw on your fingers/hand all the time and we see a little white mass under your gums on the bottom jaw. You like to play on your play mat that has toys hanging above. You also like your swing. Sometimes you get so relaxed in your swing that you fall asleep. You got a lot of toys and things for Christmas, but we haven’t had much of a chance to sit down and play with them. You are so loved. Your daddy and I hope you love music as much as we do. We play instruments and songs for you all the time. Everytime you laugh, you get the hiccups! Oh! You rolled over from your back to your tummy about three weeks ago! You did it at home. Daddy and I missed it. All of a sudden, Daddy realized that you were on your tummy. You later did it for us again  You do not like to play on your tummy. Instead, you like to be on your back. You can even scoot yourself some on your back. You enjoy bath time and never give me any fuss about it, even if you are really tired. I’m looking forward to the summer time when I can spend all my time with you. Christmas break has been wonderful! I love you to the heavens! -Mommy

Letter to Edison Oct. 22

My sweet Edison, You are 11 weeks old today. Wow, how time flies! You are the joy of my life and I couldn’t imagine loving anyone more than I love you. My favorite part of the day is in the morning when you wake up and mommy and daddy are not ready to get up, so we bring you to our bed and cuddle with you. You started smiling around 6 weeks. You first (intentionally) smiled at your Maw. Mommy was slightly jealous, but you made up for it the next day by smiling at me over and over. At night when I lay you down to sleep, you are normally awake and swaddled. You lie there and smile at me and it just melts my heart. You look so cute that it’s hard for me to walk out of your room to let you fall asleep. You are beginning to coo and make more sounds. You really like your car seat and sometimes we put you in there because we know you’ll go to sleep in it. Sometimes you get gas and it hurts your tummy. This past week I had to come home from work to see about you because you kept crying and fussing and would not eat anything. Turns out, it was just gas. You started rolling over from your tummy to your back at 3 weeks and we were amazed. Maw took you to get shots about 2 weeks ago. She said that you smiled and flirted with the nurses, but that it didn’t stop them from giving you 5 shots! The nurses said you had very strong legs. You never ran a fever from the shots. You seemed a little cranky, but otherwise, you took it well. Maw said you only cried a little while they were giving you the shot. We gave you some baby Tylenol at home and it seemed to help. I love rocking you and singing to you. I hope you love to sing as much as I do one day.Your cousin, Ivy, was born 2 days ago. I’m sure y’all will be great play mates. You drink around 4 oz every 3-4 hours. Yesterday you drank 5 oz…you are getting so big. You weigh 12 pounds, 5 oz. Your fingernails grow so quickly. I have to cut them every week. Today, you scratched near your eye to the point that it drew blood. Last Sunday was your first time in the nursery and it was very hard for me to leave you. As soon as church was over, I wasted no time in getting to you. You are such a little snuggle bug. You loved to be cuddled. You love to lie on your back and kick your legs and move your arms around. For some reason, you LOVE your changing table. When I change you, you become so excited about something, but I can’t seem to see what you’re looking and smiling at. Whatever it is, changing you at home is a breeze! I remember the first week that we brought you home. You cried every time we changed you as if we were doing something terrible to you. I was so nervous that you would always be like that, but now, you are so calm. You still have to be swaddled to go to sleep, and I wonder when you will get out of the need to be swaddled. Sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night simply because you have become un-swaddled. During the day, we let you take naps on your tummy, and you seem to like that. As a matter of fact, you are napping in your crib on your tummy and that is why I have time to write you this letter.  Your daddy and I take turns feeding you in the night. I normally take the first shift, between 9-2 and Daddy gets you from 2-6. Lately you have been sleeping through my shift, so your daddy gets the pleasure of getting up with you. We put you to bed anywhere from between 8:30 and 11:00. I love giving you baths. You seem to enjoy bath time. You just sit there as I bathe, sing, and talk to you. I normally give you baths at night. Lots of people say you look just like your daddy, but if you look at my baby pictures, you look just like me when I was a baby. Sometimes when I’m watching you sleep, I feel like I’m looking at a baby picture of myself. You have your daddy’s beautiful lips. I have to work, so on Mondays and Tuesdays, Mrs. Kristy watches you, and on Tues, Thurs, and Fri, your Maw keeps you. You haven’t been to your Pappy or Nana’s house yet. I won’t let you go yet because they smoke in their house and I don’t want anything to harm you if I can help it. They love you very much and come to our house to see you. You are their first grandchild, and you are Maw and Paw’s 4th grandchild. You like your pacifier, but you don’t have to have it all the time. You normally go to bed without it, but for car rides or just hanging out during the day, you like to suck on your pacifier. I breastfed you for the first 3 weeks of your life; I wish I could have done it longer, but I got a terrible rash called PUPPPs and had to get on steroids. It was very hard for me to only give you formula. I felt like I wasn’t providing for you, but at some point I had to just get over it and move on. As long as you are growing and staying healthy, that is what matters most. I sometimes look at you in awe. It’s hard to believe that you were made from your daddy and me. You are such a miracle and watching you breathe as you sleep never gets old for me. You are so innocent. You are beautiful inside and out. Your eyes, they are just gorgeous. You have a way of smiling without your lips, but through your eyes. I have a perfect picture of it. I hope you feel the love I have for you. I’m looking forward to watching you grow, but at the same time, wish you could stay this little forever. I love you to heaven and back, -Mommy